Jelly Unjumbled

My brain is a jelly; a fizzy, scribbly jelly of confused, twisted, tangled jumblement. So many jellies within one jelly, each jelly their own unique jelly, yet all belonging to the Jelly as a whole. Which jelly holds the truest form? Which jelly is the false-absorber? I fear the answer’s all and none… “Blend them all and call it jam!” “…freeze the jam and call it… jelly?” Jelly frozen, jelly speechless, jelly shy without a sound… Melt the droplets, evaporate, refine, re-separate – repeat the jelly process with new-found learnings, self-discoveries, new positivities – and probably, new doubts – and as my sugarworlds and bitterworlds may swirl and intermingle, I must dance with them and sing and paint and write, translating jelly-shapes – Invisible Recrystallised – jelly out, rejamify, and jelly in, rejellified – Jelly Unjumbled, Jelly Refined, Jelly Unjellied Rejellied inside…

Oh – Hello! Here I am! – and here you are, too. Thankyou for finding me here. My name is Sumita. I seem to live in many worlds, but I mostly live inbetween worlds… apart from I’m starting to think that the ‘inbetween worlds’ is my actual world… perhaps I could gather all of the between-world air-fragments and tumble-roll them up together, like when you roll up the inside of a Milky Way into a sticky sugarsphere…

I wanted to create this space for my inbetween-worlds thoughts, to encourage the process of the jelly-unjumblement – to untangle the feeling-shapes into these other-language-Words and sentences that help me to explain, discuss, question, observe. I used to think that words only come freely to me only when they think no-one’s watching… although I have recently come to learn that I may have misinterpreted this, for my words have sometimes surprised me with their presence when I’ve been typing rambly thoughts to particularly wonderful people, sometimes more so than if I’d just been writing to my selves. Perhaps there’s more to it than the fear of being watched; perhaps the only way to eliminate these irrational ‘watchers’ is to output, to externalise, reanalyse and share. Therefore, I’d like to welcome my inner-to-outer-world word-shapes with unpressured encouragement – uneager, with no demands. There is so much within the brainjelly that I’d like to unjumble and share.

Thankyou for being here, in amongst the scribble-fizz!

Sumita +.+

 

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